I’m a rambler, I always have been, properly always will be. I don’t just ramble on about nothing at all in conversation but whenever I’m writing too. Often in my Uni essays when I’m going back through and proof reading, that’s when I sometimes notice the most that I am a complete rambler. Perhaps I should have named this blog ‘Little Rambles’ or even this blog post rambles since I haven’t even gotten on topic yet.
I wear glasses, I used to wear this really thin framed type with little chains on sides. Really chic, right? Since then I’ve moved onto a wider frame in this shade dark purple-black frames. I got them when I was around 13, I only had to use them when I needed to see the board from the back of the classroom. I loved staying there, at the back, it was like I was hidden away which I preferred, it also meant an escape route was there too. Anyway, I always wanted glasses, way before I needed them and when I found I needed them, I was quite excited. I think it’s because I didn’t I looked right, and that glasses would make me look more like me. I suppose they did because I love them still and don’t want to wear contacts at all. They suit me, I think.
For me, my glasses not only allow me to see the world which is blurry and fuzzy but they make me feel comfortable. Maybe at first it made feel like Harry from Harry Potter and that meant I had some connection to him or perhaps to Dumbledore or Minerva McGonagall. Properly Minerva. Or even like Luna, when she wore the glasses from the Quibbler which meant that she was able to see the Wrackspurts.
Though maybe I used them as a mask, a way to hide part of myself which I had learn wasn’t acceptable. It wasn’t okay for me to me, so to distract my bullies from myself, I gave them an easy option. Four eyes, but they didn’t know the thing they criticised me for, was actually something I loved because the mask meant that my true self, me was a little more protected. My glasses weren’t just a mask, but a mask of protection to the true me.
Although the bullying stopped so long ago now, I will always remember. I’m thankful I needed glasses because I was protected, if only a little. Instead of hating them because of it, I came to embrace them and even now I feel so much more comfortable wearing them and think I always will. Though soon I think I will try a new style of frame and retire the one I’ve worn for the past three or four years.
I’m thankful I needed glasses, I think they were a piece of me which I always needed but also they allowed my bullies to stop tearing myself apart with their dislike of me and give them an easy target to pick on. Because of that, I now love them and will always will.