Life · Random Bits of Me

Me, Myself and Body?

Perhaps some things should be kept behind closed doors, or not mentions for everyone who has internet access to be able to read. But I promised myself that I was going to be open and honest in this blog, I think it’s important that I do. Today I want to talk about one of the most negative relationships I have had in my life, in hopes that this will help me accept it and turn this relationship into a positive one.

My relationship with my body hasn’t been the best, it’s been a two way thing. I’ve not exactly looked after it like a temple but it hasn’t exactly made me feel great about myself. Yes I do comfort eat. Who doesn’t? (If you don’t teach me your skill to not comfort eat.) I do think chocolate is an appropriate breakfast appetiser – it’s not I’m just trying to fool myself. And perhaps I don’t exactly exercise as much as I should.

Now like any not so good relationship, I’m gonna talk about why I don’t always get on with my body or maybe it’s my mind too. I can’t look in a mirror without grimacing, I’m not overweight but when I was younger I was chubby. I get scared that I am going to see the chubby girl in the mirror again, because I don’t want to see her again. When I was her I felt horrid, I felt insecure and since then I’ve always had part of that insecurity. I am self conscious about my body. I also have a skin condition, it’s genetic and not contagious although people have often treated me like it is. Psoriasis is were your skin grows too quick for your body which results in a lot of scabby, flaky and inflamed skin. I have it all over my chest, parts of my back, thighs but that’s okay because I can hide and cover it… But I also have it on my face and neck and that’s partly why I can’t look in a mirror without grimacing.

Some of the tamer bit of psoriasis.

But I kinda accepted it. My face will properly be constantly covered in psoriasis no matter what creams I use in effort to keep it calmer than it’d be without. I will have chronic jaw pain for various periods of time but as long as I don’t panic and take some painkillers then it’s manageable. If I keep a balanced diet and attempt to exercise more then I should maintain a good tonnage and perhaps begin to have a good relationship with my body?

My body and I don’t have the best relationship. If we were two separate identities then it definitely can be said we do at times teach each other badly. But when working together I feel less self-conscious than I did before. I don’t think anyone has a perfect relationship with their body, but we can all work to get a good relationship.

The best relationships are the ones you have to work at after all, right?

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@Credit Pinterest Image

3 thoughts on “Me, Myself and Body?

  1. This is such a wonderful post.I know how hard it is to try and make your body feel good. I am the exact same. I didn’t use to take care of my body and I kind of regret it now as I’ve only started to eat properly, cleanse my face, work out etc to make my body feel better even though I just want to order some food in and not do any of that :’) xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I know what you mean, all I want is to order a load of take out and eat the good stuff. But really think starting to look after my body will make me feel so much better and let me accept my body a lot more.

      Like

  2. Pingback: In My Skin.

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